Author Description

The perfect storm of social media popularity, access to massive quantities of illicit substances, and burning out on a conventional “normal life” came together at a time when Ensign knew he could not continue with a life waiting out a clock. Ensign made a deal with himself at the age of thirty-eight. He never could have imagined what was to come. Ensign's journey, as he separated himself from all he had known for thirty-eight years, became terrifyingly life-affirming. A lifelong attempt to fit into a societal “American dream” had failed. Ensign left behind relationships on all interpersonal levels. He left behind a home he loved, in the city where he grew up. He left behind a career and corporate America. He put his foot over the edge and stepped into the unknown. Hard drugs fueled travel and interactions. New interests and activities replaced everything familiar in Ensign's life. An online world consumed Ensign as he navigated an adult-themed global platform hosting millions of daily users; looking to hook up and to satiate their desires for adult media and interaction. As Ensign's popularity rose at a meteoric pace, he struggled to keep up as he learned a new way of meeting and interacting. Ensign stumbled often as he leaned into an all-consuming second life.